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More of a personal thing than anything else.

Buxton Nov 11, 2016

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  1. Buxton

    Buxton New Member

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    Why do I keep calling myself annoying? Or a prick? Or why do I tend to annoy other people? Scaring them off?

    Well, I have a myriad of issues... mainly, Asperger's, which is placed under the autism spectrum. When I had a test/review taken, they put me in the higher... "rankings?" (not sure what to call it) in said spectrum.
    It's annoying. It pisses me off... but I understand that it's a part of what I am. Who I am. But not everyone knows what it's like or how to deal with people such as me, because everyone has their... own quirks? I suck at describing things.

    That also brings me around to dyslexia. I'm dyslexic, despite having decent spelling, I struggle more with the sentence structure of things. This also leads me to use the same words over and over again, which tends to... make some RPs stale...

    Dyspraxia is also a problem, as sometimes, my reactions and co-ordination with things is a little... slow. I mean, doesn't mean much in this place... sometimes. But it's annoying when I want to play games such as League of Legends, SMITE, WoW, and games that require a quick reaction time. I still enjoy those games, but I'd love to be able to do things others can do.

    Finally, Depression. I'm talking Chronic Depression.
    My father passed away when I was ten. His funeral was two days before Christmas. And... along with undiagnosed Asperger's back then, and being bullied for near five years, it took it's toll; it got worse and worse, and seemingly mundane good things made me smile and giddy like a fool. And when something bad happens I get really down really quick, and begin to loathe myself...
    Now being Twenty Three, coming up to thirteen years later, and honestly, that hasn't changed... I guess I could be... used to this depression? I try hard not to let it consume me, but sometimes... sometimes, I tend to let it out. Via chat, talking and such. Hugging... amongst other things...
    Other times, I try to distract myself. RP... amongst other things as well...
    And then there are times where I'm not so vocal. When I just... don't say a word.

    I apologise for not properly explaining things, or if I explained this poorly. Like I said, I suck at explaining things.

    So... if I've annoyed anyone... scared anyone... caused problems for anyone... I deeply apologise... I am who I am... I try to change...

    Had to get this off my chest. Just so those who care to read'd know...
     
    Last edited: Dec 13, 2016
    The_Stray likes this.
  2. The_Stray

    The_Stray Member

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    I can sympathise with some of that (Aspergers and Depression) so if you ever need to talk I am more then willing to provide a sympathetic ear.
     
  3. Buxton

    Buxton New Member

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    edited coz I got a small detail wrong like a fool...
     
  4. Tom

    Tom dddd

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    You are not alone, Buxton. There are a fair number of People with Aspergers here, Myself included. I won't speak for others, but I've seen many mention it, as well as other Autistic spectrum disorders, too. And I too feel like I'm constantly annoying people or scaring them off.

    Perhaps we should form some sort of cult or something, the "Aspergers brotherhood of Furrypile" or something like that xD

    Jokes aside, I feel for ya, Bud. Give me a prod if you ever need to chat about stuff and things :smile:
     
  5. Buxton

    Buxton New Member

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    Thank you Tom. And thank you Stray. I appreciate it, I really do.
     
  6. Thal

    Thal dddd

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    Same, get the fact that I scare people off because I have it myself...
     
  7. Tom

    Tom dddd

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    One of us! One of us!
     
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