Stories from your D&D campaigns (any edition, tabletop only, SFW only)

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Naberius

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3 October 2016
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Georgia
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#1
What's the weirdest, creepiest or funniest stuff that has happened to you?

So, in a 5e campaign this happened.

For context, I was playing a tiefling fighter/warlock with a big sword, a goliath barbarian and a yuan-ti pureblood wild magic sorcerer.

There was one last enemy, a orc with a good couple of levels in a class who was a recurring villain thus far. So the yuan-ti pureblood dimension doors behind him, a few squares away and the goliath just yells "I'm going to rush this motherfucker" (exact words) and rams into him with the sorcerer rolling for a wild magic surge. A fireball was cast on himself and while he survived, the orc didn't. I was in the middle and took some small damage but the orc was airborne and was about to fall on top of me.

I didn't do the common sense thing and opted to finish him. My character swung his sword and well, I got a nat 20. Insta kill. The world's deadliest game of monkey in the middle.
 

Skytech

Active Member
4 October 2016
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Vulpan
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Male
#2
We were in the last encounter of an adventure. The DM was keeping track of any collateral damage to the four support pillars and each pillar crumbled over time. When the last pillar went, the ceiling came down intact crushing the party. The DM wanted to end the campaign so TPKed us no matter what.
 

Rain

Horsie
Supporter
1 October 2016
633
176
0
29
Ohio
www.furaffinity.net
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Equine
Gender
Female
#3
3.5 Ed

Set the scene.
Me: Level 17 Half Orc Fighter/Barbarian/Tactical Soldier
Best friend: Level 17 Half Orc Barbarian
Friend in game: Level 17 Healer of some sort.

Plot: We are in an Egyptian style pyramid chasing down some undead zombie like pharaoh to kill.

Ok. So the group is navigating our way through this maze like pyramid the BBB is hiding in. The group is working their way through with our rogue leading the way checking for traps. The building is littered with these things. Well the two Half Orcs being Orcs grew board of this REALLY FAST. So we decide to have a game. We each do Rock/paper/scissors and the winner gets to trip the next trap the rogue finds. (Because screw waiting on him to disarm them when a half orc can trip it!) So we vs each other and I win the first game of RPS. I run forward and the rogue found a pressure plate, so I slam my foot down on it. WHAM! A section of the wall next to me suddenly slams onto the ground, crushing the victim. I took 45 points of damage. Nothing I can't handle. The next trap was a wire going across the hall way. My friend won the next RPS and kicked the trip wire. SWOOSH! A shot ton of poisoned darts pelt his side. Though the poison was no good anymore after several thousand years in a dusty pyramid, my friend took 60 ish points of damage.

This game continued throughout the entire pyramid. How did the half orcs keep this up? We both had over 200 HP and our healer friend could heal us... by kissing his female character. So both Half orcs had fun tripping all the traps, getting damaged a shit ton, and kissed the pretty girl to heal. XD
 
Last edited:
20 January 2018
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German shepherd Husky mix
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Male
#4
5ed

My character, Kriv, was a dragon born wizard with support spells and no basic weaponry. The group was resting and got attacked by a group of zombies. In my inventory I had an old leather boot I got from looting a goblin earlier in the campaign. Having exhausted all my spells and no immediately useful cantrips I decided to throw the boot. I roll a 5. The DM's like, "You go to throw the boot but it gets stuck on your hand." My character is now known as ol' boot hand Kriv.

I finally got the boot off another rest later and managed to find another one raiding an old shack, so Kriv has a pair of old leather boots in his inventory
 

Elphyda

New Member
9 April 2018
11
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Over Yonder
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Britannian Fennec BunFox
Gender
Female
#6
Fifth edition, with some homebrew. Keep in mind, this was my first campaign ever and my introduction to Dungeons & Dragons.

Our party consisted of a homebrew swamp lizard girl thing (I don't remember what they called the race, as it was years ago) of a class I do not recall, a sort of birdfolk pirate, an edgy human monk, a cat loving human paladin, and a dragonfolk wizard. I was a Wood Elf Ranger (aiming for a fairly easy way to get involved without much confusion). The pirate was a form of evil and the one playing them was not the best of people, either.

Earlier on in the game, after we took out some bandits we found a chest in their camp. Within were some potions-- enough for each of us to have one. The pirate decided they would take them all, but by then the rest of the party-- myself included-- were getting tired of his habits. What we decided to do was simple: try to get a potion. The rolls to steal a bottle and to hold the bottle were as follows (In Steal:Keep format):

20:1
19:1
17:2
10:2
20:1

All in all, it was like the pirate was happily giving the potions to us one by one as we walked by with how the rolls played out. The one playing the pirate was furious, but the rest of us had difficulty breathing through our laughter.

I have a few other stories as well, but this was the crowning gem of what got me into the game, so I felt I should share it above anything else. :aww:
 

Frosty

New Member
2 May 2018
5
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#7
I was part of a campain years ago. My friends and I got together every weekend while we were in college. Around our third year (this campain lasted a total of 9 years, with 3 of the original characters, and 5 of the original players) our party mage managed to find a 'Deck of Many Things' and being the joker he was would often invite other characters to draw from the deck. We had just gotten a freshman into our group. He spent 3 days pouring over every players handbook, trying to make the 'perfect' character. He joined us just after midterms and was introducing his elf thief to the party.

"Hey I got something kinda neat" we heard our mage say. "Want to try your luck? Could get something good, could get something bad... Yah never know."

Everyone at the table shook thier heads, but as the offer was in character we couldn't warn him off. The elf drew 1 card, "void" and has his character's soul sucked out 30 seconds into joining the party. Shortest adventuring carrer of the campain. Our DM let the elf's 'twin brother' take his place.
 
14 June 2017
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#8
I was GMing a homebrew campaign with a couple of friends once. One was a Drunken Master Monk and the other I don't remember. They came across a large hole that they could not jump across nor go around, even though it wouldn't matter since they were supposed to go into the hole since at the bottom was a portal that led to a Dragon Temple. Anyways, they don't know they are supposed to go down this large and dark hole, so they start to throw stuff down it to try and measure the depth of the hole. I should probably let you know that neither of my two friends are the brightest of people. The Drunken Master gets to the point of where the only thing left he could throw was his ale which, if you couldn't guess from the name, was important for combat. The other gives up and just jumps down the hole, taking him to the dragon temple. I don't remember how the monk got down there though.

An entire half of a boss battle with a skeletonized dragon later, the monk ends up being "poisoned" by a darkstone. After some freaking out, the other decides to look through their inventory for anything that might help, well low and behold, he ended up finding his bundle of 100 yd rope!
 

Skytech

Active Member
4 October 2016
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Vulpan
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Male
#9
In the last D&D5e game I was in, I played a female tabaxi (feline race from Maztica) who is a rogue arcane trickster. Another player was running a female tabaxi druid. As the game went on we acted as a team within the team using our abilities to compliment each other. Soon we were speaking with thick Skyrim khajiit accents and dddrolling ahr ahddrs. We addressed each other as 'seestahdd' and, every now and then, sung a bar of the Siamese Twins song from Lady and the Tramp.

When we had defeated a couple of thugs as the rest of the party fought their own battle, we wanted to interrogate a survivor and had this back and forth sultry conversation what we planned on doing to him involving sharp tabaxi claws. A successful Intimidation roll helped and he spilled his guts.... metaphorically, of course. With a claw to his nose, "You go now as we prddomised. You ardd quite safe but do naht crddoss us evah. Seestah and I will enjoy the hunt. Is trddue, seestah?"

"Is moost trddue!"

We ardd Siamese if you ple-ese....!"

Best game ever.