NSFW The corrupted wish game, NSFW allowed

[Mambi]

GRANTED! <your house s surrounded by rings of salt, prevent any snail from ever daring to deliver your physical mail>

I wish I could access all the fun stuff in people's mail first and play with it before they receive it. For quality testing of course.

 

[metatherat]

Granted, but this is how you get exposure. Not to popularity, but to pathogens (you don't know where the fun stuff has been, or how fun the fun stuff has been)

I wish there was a snailsona here around the 'pile :O

 

[Mambi]

Granted: There is, his name's Slowsky and he's approaching the keyboard now from the bedroom. He'll arrive in 4 years.

I wish people were more openly sexually...just everyone nude and free and comfortable and having fun all day!

 

[metatherat]

Granted, but this was the furry fandom :O
The whole place is now a mess of vore and living suits and latex and glue and mud and Fat Sonic and multiboobs and gets squooshed against the floor by someone's hyper penis

I wish whoever this is had a smaller penis :O

 

[RhosSalix]

Granted. still hyper balls though. still trapped under that.

I wish that people that make content I happen to like didn't inevitably touch kids. That's all they had to do! WHY?! WHY DO PEOPLE WHO MAKE THINGS KEEP TOUCHING KIDS?!

 

[metatherat]

Granted, but now they repel kids instead. With immense force and velocity! :O

I wish that the kids would become extra squooshy so that they won't get hurt when they collide with stuff :O

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but they never regain their original shape

I wish orange was a shape

 

[Mambi]

GRANTED: You are given LSD. Orange becomes the shape of wonderment, green the sound of wings in the sunset, and purple the haze of consciousness maaan!

I wish I could explore the most scenic places on Earth.

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but you are in a bubble where you are devoid of all senses

I wish I could ride a banana peel

 

[Faust]

Granted!



I wish for @Bunny Lvr to have a nice soft landing (from not too far up) on me :)

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but I land in your lunch and @Spilo eats it all

I wish @Spilo would share with me

 

[metatherat]

I wish @Spilo would share with me

Granted, he does! But the lunch was all pickled beets. Yucksy beets.

I wish someone took these vile pickled beets far away from meh.

 

[Spilo]

Granted! You get stinky skunk cabbage instead!

I wish I could experience the joys of today :3

 

[metatherat]

You can. But the joys are so joyful that the joys of tomorrow seem crappy by comparison :O

I wish a magical trout would fly in through the window and grant me a wish.

 

[Spilo]

You hear a crack on your window and the next thing you see is me, in a crappy fish onesie, inside your room Your wish.. has actually been granted! :P

I wish all foxes around the world burped and farted all at the same time

 

[metatherat]

Granted, they do! But it's not very noteworthy, because all the tasty chickens and bunnies had armed themselves with carbines, forcing the foxes to subsist on a diet of dry pinecones.

I wish people realized how ridiculously overpriced boxes of christmas chocolates are, it is a SCAM I tell you, let's revolt! >:I

 

[Faust]

Granted! Unfortunately, in a highly unlikely turn of events, it turns out that advent calendars and little cardboard tubes of partly-chocolate and mostly air... those were the only things keeping Christmas profitable! Without the cash incentive and no financial reason to keep pushing 'holiday cheer', the practice withers and dies. Congratulations, you just killed Christmas! Not even the Catholic Church managed that.

I wish for a pet giant tardigrade.

 

[Spilo]

Granted! You did not, however, consider the consequences of bringing tiny organisms to gigantic sizes. Just like with ants if they were made human or hell even car sized, it dies squished and suffocated under our atmosphere.

That was a good wish, damn ;-; I wish giant insects were unaffected by the silly laws of physics :3

 

[Faust]

Granted!

Eeee! It worked! Look what I found at the store today!

That was a good wish, damn ;-; I wish giant insects were unaffected by the silly laws of physics :3

Okay! Giant insects are not affected by the laws of physics. They all float off into space because gravity doesn't affect them, and there they will live forever because thermodynamics doesn't affect them either. Oh, and they might be drifting backwards in time too...

I wish I could feed my enemies to a nasty ol' D&D-style gelatinous cube.

 

[metatherat]

I wish I could feed my enemies to a nasty ol' D&D-style gelatinous cube.

Granted! But you have no enemies because you are a nice bat and we all wuv yoo. So the gelatinous cubes ooze off to do whatever. Look, they are entering that orphanage :O

I wish I had a pet owlbear.