Dragoneer has passed away

[Tycho]

Yaka, this just goes to show that you have zero idea what goes on peoples' heads. Calling people out for being unhealthy is in itself an unhealthy decision. A lot of people don't WANT to be unhealthy. Eating disorders are very much a real thing, same thing with addictions. Things like trauma, depression, and many other factors in peoples' lives will make them go down these paths. It's completely unfair to just say "oh well he was unhealthy anyway", or to anyone for that matter. Not to mention that sometimes things like drugs, alcohol, and food are significantly cheaper than seeking help. What, should people be less allowed to get help if they're in this state? I guarantee you Dragoneer had a lot of things happening in his life and that's why he was the way he was. He didn't get fucking make unhealthy decisions with malicious intent. Nobody does.

I love both of my brothers to death. My other brother (well, technically half brothers, they're both way older than me and we all share the same mom but my two brothers share a different dad) has been clean for a couple years now, but had a major drug and alcohol problem. Most of it stemmed from when he was a kid, when his dad would abuse my brothers when my mom wasn't around (this was before I was born). My mom caught him a couple times doing that to them, and did everything in her power to stop it from happening. It partly attributes to why Dillon has been depressed (not to mention how his friends treat him) today, and it's also what made Cody depressed and resort to heroin and booze. And it took a LOT to get him out of that. So if the healthcare system, or really anybody for that matter, considered my brothers less worthy of treatment because of their health, saying something like "they were unhealthy anyways", even though there's a reason for why they're in the states their in, I'd beat the shit out of whoever says so. Sitting there going "just have a healthy lifestyle" is such an ignorant fucking thing to say when you know nothing about them.

You're lucky I don't know if you in real life, else I would've broke your nose for saying something like that. I would do anything for my brothers and I don't find it fair that other people could get to dictate what happens to them just because of their choices, not giving a shit the reason why they made those choices.

...The hell. Calm down. Neer absolutely took poor care of himself physically and financially. He also didn't deserve to get screwed by the doctors like this. Both can be true.

Threatening people with fucking violence over this? Don't make me tell you about Neer's connections to Tora/Growly. Might get you chasing off after other people to threaten.

 

[Jack Foxtrot]

...The hell. Calm down. Neer absolutely took poor care of himself physically and financially. He also didn't deserve to get screwed by the doctors like this. Both can be true.

Threatening people with fucking violence over this? Don't make me tell you about Neer's connections to Tora/Growly. Might get you chasing off after other people to threaten.

Sorry, just... people talking about things like that is something I can't help but take to heart. I hate it when people just say "it wouldn't be so bad if they had a healthy lifestyle" or some shit, because it completely undermines practically all factors involved.

 

[Jack Foxtrot]

@Yakamaru sorry for lashing out at you there. Maybe I went a little too far. I think everyone should be able to get the proper help they need regardless of their past choices. That's what healthcare's there for, they're there to help. Or at least, they're supposed to be, anyways. It's just I've personally had people say shit like that about people like my brothers and other people, and knowing what they went through and why they are the way they are, it undermines a lot of things about them. They should be able to get help the same as any other person. Dictating how much help one can get just on past choices alone would be unfair. A lot of things happen behind closed doors, no matter how open one may seem. You'll never truly know the reason why someone is unhealthy. Like I said, food, drugs and alcohol are all cheaper than getting help. I guarantee that's probably why so many people today are obese, addicted or drunkards. It's the easiest and cheapest way to cope for them.

 

[Yakamaru]

Yaka, this just goes to show that you have zero idea what goes on peoples' heads. Calling people out for being unhealthy is in itself an unhealthy decision. A lot of people don't WANT to be unhealthy. Eating disorders are very much a real thing, same thing with addictions. Things like trauma, depression, and many other factors in peoples' lives will make them go down these paths. It's completely unfair to just say "oh well he was unhealthy anyway", or to anyone for that matter. Not to mention that sometimes things like drugs, alcohol, and food are significantly cheaper than seeking help. What, should people be less allowed to get help if they're in this state? I guarantee you Dragoneer had a lot of things happening in his life and that's why he was the way he was. He didn't get fucking make unhealthy decisions with malicious intent. Nobody does.

I love both of my brothers to death. My other brother (well, technically half brothers, they're both way older than me and we all share the same mom but my two brothers share a different dad) has been clean for a couple years now, but had a major drug and alcohol problem. Most of it stemmed from when he was a kid, when his dad would abuse my brothers when my mom wasn't around (this was before I was born). My mom caught him a couple times doing that to them, and did everything in her power to stop it from happening. It partly attributes to why Dillon has been depressed (not to mention how his friends treat him) today, and it's also what made Cody depressed and resort to heroin and booze. And it took a LOT to get him out of that. So if the healthcare system, or really anybody for that matter, considered my brothers less worthy of treatment because of their health, saying something like "they were unhealthy anyways", even though there's a reason for why they're in the states their in, I'd beat the shit out of whoever says so. Sitting there going "just have a healthy lifestyle" is such an ignorant fucking thing to say when you know nothing about them.

How are someone going to know that what they're doing is unhealthy if they've not been told, you know, the truth? Even more so when you do know them, you're letting someone suffer and have unhealthy habits when you say nothing being passive. A shitty friend would say nothing and shy away from reality, a good friend would actually tell you the truth. It doesn't matter if they don't want to hear it, it needs to be spoken, even more so when they are committed to unhealthy if not outright dangerous habits and lifestyle choices. It is what one would expect from an emotionally immature individual.

..Have no one ever told you that you're wrong before?

The healthcare system is there for assistance, but it can't contain, control nor manage shitty lifestyle choices/habits for you. You're responsible first and foremost for your own health, and the easiest way to not having to deal with that shit is to stay healthy to begin with. i.e. maintain a good weight, keep up regular exercise, eat healthy food and get enough sleep, to mention some of the most important factors. You know, factors you as an individual can actually control.

Calling someone out for being unhealthy is the antidote/cure to such habits. How else other than admitting to having a problem is one to be able to find a solution? Shoving one's head so far up your own ass that you can lick the back of your own tongue is not going to make the problem go away, you're just ignoring it, refusing to acknowledge it even exists. Ignorance helps no one, especially one that's founded on blind altruism/goodwill, as it can end up poisonous and possibly even deadly to one's mind, heart and soul.

You're lucky I don't know if you in real life, else I would've broke your nose for saying something like that. I would do anything for my brothers and I don't find it fair that other people could get to dictate what happens to them just because of their choices, not giving a shit the reason why they made those choices.

Lol.

 

[Eyleifr]

I don't find it fair that other people could get to dictate what happens to them just because of their choices, not giving a shit the reason why they made those choices.

You can't justify anything because of the past, it's a shitty way. I'm not trying to convince you, because it doesn't make sense, but threatening someone with violence is excessive:/

 

[Jack Foxtrot]

You can't justify anything because of the past, it's a shitty way. I'm not trying to convince you, because it doesn't make sense, but threatening someone with violence is excessive:/

I know, I've already apologized.

 

[Bunny Lvr]

I did not know him, was never on FA but have gathered how awesome it is/was and how beneficial ti the furdom it was/is. This infuriates me and wishes healing for his family

 

[Simo]

That's too bad. Condolences to friends and family.

 

[Firuthi Dragovic]

Bit of an update on this one:

They posted a GoFundMe for... various expenses related to all of this. They actually listed expenses in the announcement.

Funeral, urn, mortgage payments (so Dragoneer's mom has time to sort things out), past due medical bills...

And about half of what the GoFundMe's goal was, was keeping FurAffinity's lights on and affording expenses for the legal transition.

Looks like the GoFundMe has raised nearly double its goal already, and it's been maybe 2 days since it was posted. Though that's the initial goal - they only listed estimates, and the IRS bill wasn't determined at time of post.

 

[Katara the Sergal]

Bit of an update on this one:

They posted a GoFundMe for... various expenses related to all of this. They actually listed expenses in the announcement.

Funeral, urn, mortgage payments (so Dragoneer's mom has time to sort things out), past due medical bills...

And about half of what the GoFundMe's goal was, was keeping FurAffinity's lights on and affording expenses for the legal transition.

Looks like the GoFundMe has raised nearly double its goal already, and it's been maybe 2 days since it was posted. Though that's the initial goal - they only listed estimates, and the IRS bill wasn't determined at time of post.

Looks like it's slowing down quite a lot. It was at $122,000 yesterday, now it's at $144,000. Still, that's nearly double, as you said, which is fucking incredible, and it's heartwarming to see the community come together so beautifully for ONCE. Probably the most teamwork I've ever seen from the fandom in a long time. I doubt it'll grow much from here for however long the fundraiser keeps going, but it's still pretty damn impressive what it's achieved. Also Bad Dragon donated $10,000. Ten fucking thousand.

 

[Yakamaru]

They can raise nearly 150k for a dead guy but don't care for people when they are still alive.

And the fandom isn't responsible for keeping FA running, that is on the staff's hands.

Dead guy
Public celebration of life

Yeah.. I don't think that's how it works. Nor for the fandom to pay for either.

 

[Tycho]

The fandom did put a TON of money into FA when Neer was still alive. There were multiple fundraising drives. Details on some were very dodgy.

 

[Simo]

Bit of an update on this one:

They posted a GoFundMe for... various expenses related to all of this.

Yet they couldn't try a GoFundMe to keep the Fur Affinity Forum up and running instead of ditching the FAF for that EFFFFFFFed-up Discord. No common sense at FA at all.

 

[Tycho]

Yet they couldn't try a GoFundMe to keep the Fur Affinity Forum up and running instead of ditching the FAF for that EFFFFFFFed-up Discord. No common sense at FA at all.

/shrug

don't miss it as much as I thought I would

 

[Firuthi Dragovic]

They can raise nearly 150k for a dead guy but don't care for people when they are still alive.

And the fandom isn't responsible for keeping FA running, that is on the staff's hands.
View attachment 10243

They actually updated the expenses yesterday because they found more debts. And they added some more explanations for the new stuff.

If even half of this is true.... apparently Dragoneer took out a loan to keep FA running, and had some serious debts related to contract work done for the site?

The fandom may not be responsible for keeping FA running, but the staff are basically being like "if we don't get some help paying off Dragoneer's debts, a debtor who doesn't have our community's best interests at heart will gain possession of FA".

Make of that what you will, and make your own decisions about Dragoneer's handling of finances. I get the feeling that putting his funeral expenses in there is basically being done to put his mother's heart at ease. She has to deal with some of 'Neer's final affairs after all.

 

[Yakamaru]

They actually updated the expenses yesterday because they found more debts. And they added some more explanations for the new stuff.

If even half of this is true.... apparently Dragoneer took out a loan to keep FA running, and had some serious debts related to contract work done for the site?

The fandom may not be responsible for keeping FA running, but the staff are basically being like "if we don't get some help paying off Dragoneer's debts, a debtor who doesn't have our community's best interests at heart will gain possession of FA".

Make of that what you will, and make your own decisions about Dragoneer's handling of finances. I get the feeling that putting his funeral expenses in there is basically being done to put his mother's heart at ease. She has to deal with some of 'Neer's final affairs after all.

Was updated to 225k-ish last time I saw. Only shows people in this fandom suck at handling finances. Imagine having debt and financial issues worth 1.5x that of a decent house, that's insane.

Would rather have a tab for "Donate to BLM" rather than a "Donate to keep this site going". Shows where people's priorities lie, and now that have come around to bite them in the ass. We've known FA have been run poorly for years and it was only a matter of time before stuff started collapsing. Transparency is paramount, especially when you are looking at negative numbers in terms of finances. It doesn't help to shove it all under the rug.

 

[Yakamaru]

But I digress. This thread is about the passing of Dragoneer, not how poorly FA was ran, so I will stop there out of respect for him and his family. I wish his family and friends well in this time of sadness.

 

[SirRob]

But I digress. This thread is about the passing of Dragoneer, not how poorly FA was ran, so I will stop there out of respect for him and his family. I wish his family and friends well in this time of sadness.

Clearly we need a topic on how poorly FA is being run

 

[Katara the Sergal]

Clearly we need a topic on how poorly FA is being run

I concur. While I cannot necessarily refute the negative comments (everyone has a valid point here, good and bad), it does seem a little disrespectful, all the bitching and complaining. This should be a place for positivity and mourning, and at the very least, respect. Regardless of how the man ran Fur Affinity, and how bad he was with finances and personal health, he's dead now, and I think the least we can do here is honor that. BUT - I'm not saying anybody's wrong here. A separate thread just for the bitching and moaning would be entirely valid, and perhaps valuable as a place to collect and gather the grievances and shortcomings of Fur Affinity under Dragoneer's direction, and perhaps negativity towards the person himself. It might prove useful if any Fur Affinity staff ever see the threads in this place, to better help understand what not to do going forward. Or, at least to highlight what they don't fix if nothing changes.

 

[Simo]

A separate thread just for the bitching and moaning would be entirely valid, and perhaps valuable as a place to collect and gather the grievances and shortcomings of Fur Affinity under Dragoneer's direction, and perhaps negativity towards the person himself. It might prove useful if any Fur Affinity staff ever see the threads in this place, to better help understand what not to do going forward. Or, at least to highlight what they don't fix if nothing changes.

Been there; done that. Last year, after the announcement of the closure of the Fur Affinity Forum. ESSSSS-loads of posts about the mismanagement going on at FA. I don't know what else could be said in that regard.

I don't know if having any FA staff seeing posts here would do any good. The nonsense has been on-going now for well over a decade. They've had plenty of time to see the negative consequences and do something to correct what clearly isn't working.