NSFW The corrupted wish game, NSFW allowed

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted, but all this vampire behaviour around horses forever keeps the possibility out of reach that a horse joins this forum, something greatly desired by many (probably due to horse back riding being so fun and no other reasons :3)

I wish there was an active Mule on the forum!

 

[metatherat]

Granted, but he turns out to be like a mega incel nazi, and all he does is spout phrases and talking points he learned off Twitter.

I wish that the active Mule found furriness in his heart and stopped acting like a damn chatbot.

 

[Spilo]

Granted! But before the mule does that or even before he arrives to the forums, you get fined for illegal horse neck blood drinking and also loses all the prey's trust who point at him and say "OMG Predation :O"

Once @metatherat is thrown into jail the new resident mule arrives, safe from blood drinkers like that evil rat

I wish furries were furrier

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted but now all we post is "uwu"

I wish we could Arooooo too

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but all we do is Aroooooo and say
Scooby Dooby Dooooo

I wish I had some Scooby Snacks

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted, but the pawlice arrest you for the possession of bakery that includes very special butter, calling you a dirty hippy!

I wish I had a secret stash of scooby snacks :3 duuude

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but you get your cartoons mixed up and it's pizza KOWABUNGA DUDE!

I wish I had a turtle in a half shell wearing a red bandana

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted but there's no guarantee that Splinter doesn't show up (with a familar looking friend) to steal stuff from your pantry!

I wish I had a digimon-friend

 

[metatherat]

You do, but it's Chuumon, and he steals stuff from your pantry.
Oh, I need to corrupt it somehow... uhhh.... you also lose your wallet.

I wish I too had Chuumon as a friend :3

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted but he also steals your wallet (though he says that it's merely a coincidence that happens where ever he goes).

I wish Chuumon would not be my friend anymore :( or at least seek councelling for kleptomania

 

[metatherat]

He does, but that means that he attends a thievery class at the local thieves' guild and becomes even better at stealing your wallet.

I wish Chuumon will be satisfied being my friend although I do not have a wallet any more

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted, but now he's always looking over your shoulder when you talk, eyeing your prized silk rat hammock.

I wish the pawlice would give Chuumon a good old telling off!

 

[metatherat]

They do, but this consists of a police officer cruising past Chuumon in his cruiser and giving him the finger while shouting "Fuck you, Chuumon!".

I wish Chuumon stopped telling that story to everyone he meets, it's getting a bit repetitive.

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted, but now he keeps telling everyone the stories in which he stole their wallets, making every furson rather annoyed.

I wish Chuumon good luck in the hospital after he pushed his luck too many times!

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but he now has amnesia and steals paperclips

I wish I knew where all my paperclips were

 

[Chad Firepaws]

Oh, so that's why my metal detector keeps going off when I hold it near your bum


I wish I could make jokes that weren't sexual innuendos

 

[metatherat]

You can, but they all now involve obscure media references that nobody gets.

I wish planet-eating machines could be defeated by joy and not eating any more canned food.

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted, but the planet eating machines are very good at making everyone stumped.

I wish we'd finally just use ocean water to rust them, it helped with alien plant creatures before

 

[metatherat]

Granted, we could! But for some reason we don't, we just stand about like a bunch of idiots going 'doodedoo, du duduu. I am so smrt' while the machines eat stuff.

I wish I worked for a rodent detective agency irl

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted! But the filing of cases is rather difficult: do chew marks mean "evidence" and why does this one smell awefully much like urine?

I wish the rodent detective agency would pay for rodent language courses as part of their job package.