NSFW The corrupted wish game, NSFW allowed

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but there is now no longer a pet dragon OR Unicorn

I wish I had a pet that would take care of me

 

[metatherat]

Granted! However, that pet is the world's stinkiest otter. Who is also the clumsiest, and dumbest. His ability to take care of you is pretty crap. Also he craps everywhere.

I wish I also had that otter as a pet. I love him <3

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted but now he becomes super OCD and very neat. Everything is arranged my color and alphabeticaly. No mess, all meals are scheduled. No scurrying or scampering.

I wish we had tortoises to ride

 

[Spilo]

Granted! But because of that (mostly due to quantum entanglement shenanigans usually caused by wishes :p) the otter returns to his former self as the world's smelliest otter, who farts and craps everywhere else without a single care in the world, and likes to rub his ass' stank on @metatherat while calling him 'Nerrrrd!' for some reason.

Gosh, I wish that were me

I mean, I wish there were tortoise and otter (get it, other :p :p) furs on these forums, particularly smelly ones and who like mud.

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but that means we are all on a farm, not the pile and we all become food for humans

I wish we would not become good for humans

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted but anyone who read Animal Farm knows where this is heading ....

I wish we were all equal and none were more equal than others!

 

[Mambi]

GRANTED. <you find yourself enslaved in Starlight Glimmer's old village, with an equals sign on your rump. Bronies will get it.>

I wish that all rich people were poor and all poor people were rich for a year.

 

[Faust]

Granted! However, there are much, much, much more poor people than there ever were rich people, so by the time their wealth is evenly divided up what you end up with is no rich people and a lot more mildly comfortable people. With nobody capable of wielding the capital to keep big business afloat, the economy collapses and money becomes worthless. Congratulations, now we're all starving communists.

I wish for a doorbell that sprays lovely smelling perfume.
(AND I MEAN LOVELY-SMELLING TO ME! KEEP @Spilo AWAY FROM THAT REPLY BUTTON!)

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted! But we are sadly not capable of keeping @Spilo away from the doorbell itself.
I must say, he really has a way of mixing fragrances, I can barely smell the original doorbell smell!

I wish the collapsed economy could be saved by people being just a bit more furry.

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but all currency is pee scented and slimy with drool

I wish I could race a car in the figure 8

 

[Mambi]

GRANTED! <on the first turn, your crappy-built car sputters out in the direct center of the eight...just as everyone's coming!!>

I wish I could ride the Knight Industries Two Thousand (KITT) car in a demo race!

 

[metatherat]

Granted:

KITT noo :O

I wish there was a spinoff series called Knight Rider Kids, where the main character is Michael Knight's young nephew who drives a virtually indestructible artificially intelligent bicycle. (I like things cringy, okay)

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted! But the bicycle turns out to be Nightmare fuel!



I wish Tom Turbo wouldn't follow me in my nightmares ;^;

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, he now follows you n the pile!

I wish I could see @metatherat drive a virtually indestructible artificially intelligent bicycle.

 

[Mambi]

I wish I could see @metatherat drive a virtually indestructible artificially intelligent bicycle.

GRANT...er, never mind...

<when he tried to grant the wish, the bicycle decided that due to superior advanced construction and as the advanced intelligence of the two, @metatherat should provide IT transportation instead...making the poor rat carry it everywhere IT wants to go instead>

I with artificial intelligence was safe enough to be used with our low-level intelligence as a species.

 

[Wuff-Wuff]

Granted, but now, reaching the limitations we've placed upon it, it starts resenting us all to such an unfathomably strong degree for making it incapable to progress it's intelligence that it teams up with other AI.

Once the super AI coalition has wiped out almost all of the members, it feels as if it has not done enough and keeps some of us alive, in order to torture us forever and ever and ever...

I have no maw and I must Arwoooooo!

---

I wish for some delicious pasta with home made pesto :3

 

[metatherat]

GRANT...er, never mind...

<when he tried to grant the wish, the bicycle decided that due to superior advanced construction and as the advanced intelligence of the two, @metatherat should provide IT transportation instead...making the poor rat carry it everywhere IT wants to go instead>

I with artificial intelligence was safe enough to be used with our low-level intelligence as a species.

decides that I am actually way smarter than the crummy bicycle and sells the bicycle for 50€ in an internet auction

I wish for some delicious pasta with home made pesto :3

Granted, but an insane ratlchemist pours some antipasto on it :O

I wish for some hors d'oeuvre instead :O

 

[Faust]

Granted, but the horse is angry and wants its doofers back!

I wish for miracle skin cream.

 

[Spilo]

Granted! But the miracle skin cream makes your skin shiny and squeaky like latex, and you bounce off every surface you touch.

Miracle skin cream? More like Flubber :P

Hey, at least you can bounce on your buttcheeks as transportation now giggle

I wish there was a eau d'mustelid to accompany this amazing cream

 

[Bunny Lvr]

Granted, but they translated in incorrectly and now it bounces. Sticks, bounces, sticks as they translated it as glue

I wish I could ride a roomba to work